A Seed and a Bean: Working Mom again

With the rising costs of diapers, food, clothing, and other baby essentials mothers find themselves like other mothers before them going back to work after a period of time. I must say I was one of the lucky ones I was able to stay home with my children for a while. However, now I've joined the force of mothers with jobs. Trying to balance work, doctor's appointments, grocery shopping, cleaning the house, teething and growing twins. It becomes difficult for a mother when she feels as if someone else is spending the important times with your child(ren) I mean for me I am lucky again because I have retired parents who don't mind watching my babies, but what about those mothers that have to turn their children over to the dreaded DAYCARE or nannies!? I'm so particular about what my children eat and watch and the books that are being read to them that I find daycares repulsive. I'm not saying that there aren't some very good facilities that take good care of children, however, I find it odd turning my child(ren) over to someone that doesn't love them like I do and it's a JOB for them. MY BABIES AREN'T A JOB! A handful maybe but a job never. So I decided when I was pregnant that my babies would stay in a loving environment where they are getting the love I would give them and the attention they deserve, as well as the diet that I set forth for them. So many times I've heard horror stories about natural mothers that feed their children organic meals and vegan/vegetarian diets and then they go somewhere to be taken care of while the parents are away (working, or just taking some adult time) and their child is being feed all sorts of things that aren't good for them. Or are not being paid close attention to or even worse being WATCHED by the television. UGH!

So how do you find that balance. How do you find a daycare or nanny that is going to respect your wishes and not just do whatever they feel is necessary to get through a day with your child(ren)? How do you work all day and still feel as if you're giving your child the quality of yourself?

Sometimes I'm afraid I'm going to miss everything, especially now since they are about to start walking. I'm afraid I won't be there, I'll be in some office working for pay, beneath my worth, trying to give my children what they need and at the end of the day I feel like all they really need is me! But money makes the world go around and the store doesn't take love for diapers and clothes and food. SO I'm a working mom still trying hold it all together and some how maintain my chi.